23rd August 2016
It’s about this time each year that I get all deep and reflective.
Most probably a mixture of my yearning for Spring (…Winter has been long and cold this year…) and also the fact that it will be my birthday next month.
Another year passed. A little wiser. A few more wrinkles on this old mug.
Let’s rewind a few years to 2012.
I was turning 30 and struggling big time, (ridiculous now when I think about it…) but I was totally down in the dumps about leaving my glorious twenties behind.
A decade that for me, was the best yet!
All the big milestones: engagement, wedding, babies, houses….and I really wasn’t quite sure my 30’s could stand up in comparison. I didn’t think there was much left..apart from day-to-day life and all that comes with it.
I’d been a wife and Mum for so long and still didn’t really know “what I wanted to be when I grew up”.
Lily was in Prep and Spencer was enjoying the year at home with me. He was due to start 4 year old kinder the following year and I absolutely adored the time we spent together. Life was so simple and seemed to go by a little slower.
At the time, those of my friends who had already hit the big 3-0 were telling me how great it is.
That “30 is the new black”… “Life begins at 30″…blah, blah, blah…
I wasn’t convinced.
But now….almost 4 years on. I see that they were onto something.
It sounds totally wanky, but since entering my 30’s, my whole view on life has changed.
I know myself more than ever and I actually really like the person I am.
I didn’t think I would ever be able to say that and truly believe it, but I do.
I used to spend so much time worrying about what people thought of me. Always trying to impress and pushing myself beyond my limits to please others.
Working myself up into a little ball of anxiety…
The fact is – we’re not always going to get along with everyone we meet. We’re not always going to be everyone’s cup of tea – and that is okay. Totally okay.
I have realised that quality is so much better than quantity.
I can count my best friends on one hand. I always have.
I know that it’s okay to say ‘no’ sometimes. To realise when I’ve reached my limits and reduce added stress.
I know it’s okay to be wrong. To admit defeat. To apologise and move on.
I know that sometimes relationships can become toxic and knowing when to walk away is actually a success within itself.
I know that it’s okay to be selfish. To do something for me, and only me. To put myself first (sometimes).
I know I am a spiritual soul. I need faith in my life. To believe, and to know there is a power greater than me.
I know that it is okay to not always have every little thing worked out and to just let go, and wing it from time to time…
I know that meditation does me the world of good and needs to be a daily priority.
I know that I can’t drink as much wine as I used to, and that chocolate isn’t always the answer…(just most of the time…)
I know that it’s okay to NOT be okay. And to ask for help.
I also now know that the kids won’t die if they don’t have vegetables with their dinner 7 nights a week, or eat white bread now and then…!
I know that on my day off, it is perfectly acceptable to drop the kids to school in my dressing gown…
I know that so far – this 30’s caper is pretty bloody great and if the past few years are anything to go by – then the rest of the decade is going to be one hell of a ride!
After all – “when you stop and look around, this life is pretty amazing!”
Thanks for listening to my waffle yet again. As always, I love to hear from you, so please drop me a quick line if you so please. I love a chat!
Leaving you with one of my favourite quotes.
My dear old Dad read this to me on my wedding day.